I KNOW IT'S, BEEN A WHILE
Wow, it’s been almost a month. Things have been either crazy or boring. Not much new to really tell. I have been looking for a job, well not that hard this past week though. I have to call the school district today to see if there is any hope of the job I applied for. Keep your fingers crossed for me, as I am getting pretty burnt out looking and calling people. Either they want nights and weekends available (which just wouldn’t work for us) or they are to far away and I wouldn’t be able to make it there on time and get theAidan to school. Uhgggg.
The OS has been very well behaved lately. She has only called a couple of times since I last wrote. I wonder if telling her that my life and affairs with my Ex and his family is really none of her business had anything to do with it lol. I can’t remember if I blogged about my lunch with her or not. If not I will sometime.
I am trying really hard to not let this crappy cold weather get to me too much. Doesn’t help when friends from CA call and tell me THEY ARE HAVING A FREAKING HEAT WAVE though. The kids only have about three and a half weeks of school left. They should be in shorts and T’s daydreaming about summer and not paying attention in school. Instead they are dreading if they have to go out side for PE classes, of if they are dressed warm enough because the heat is set so low in there classrooms. Yeash.
Aidan is really home sick. I let them watch TV while eating dinner last night, and some commercial came on and he piped up and said “ I blame you mom for us having to move here, well maybe not you, but the people that own the town house”. It just about broke my heart. I explained to him that it was not their fault either. It just happened they way it happened for a lot of reasons. That there was not one person or one thing to blame it on. He seemed to be ok with it after that. But I’ll tell you, its moments like that that I just want to pack the car and leave. Figure out what to do as I go. Get my measly job back and live in a freaking cheap motel until I figure it out. And then my inner voice (well actually its my brothers voice) tells my how wrong and irresponsible that is lol. But one can daydream, right?
I think my mother has finally figured out that here is not where I belong anymore. And that I just won’t be really happy here, ever. She actually told me that once we are on our feet again that maybe we should go visit my father and see how we like Florida. And went on about how the weather is close to CA, and the scenery minus the mountains is just as beautiful. And that its close enough for family to drive to in a day or so, or cheap enough to fly to. The last one just about killed me lol. Ya, just close enough for family to stay for a whole week. During summer vacations, spring break and winter break. And who, just who do you think that would be? Bingo. I know you guessed right. My brother never takes a full week off. And I know how hard that was for her to suggest seeing how my father would then have a chance to be in the kids lives more than she would.
Well, time to make that call now. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed. Maybe I will get a chance to blog more later. I do actually have a few more things I would like to blog about. And I think I need to blog when I feel it in me, or it could be another month before I do.
TTFN
Posted on 05/25/05 at 10:44 AM