HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVE
Well it’s here. It won’t be our traditional Christmas this year. The kids are really taking all of this pretty well. Better than I am anyway. The girls are hidden in their room making presents out of felt for their brother. I sneaked Aidan a couple of dollars last week to buy little trinkets at the school fair for his sisters.
I am trying very hard not to let my self get really depressed about this whole thing. I think if it wasn’t for the fact that I have no idea what or where we are going to go after the first of the year, this holiday really wouldn’t be all that bad. The kids really are doing ok with the fact that we can’t get them any gifts. The still have a few things to open from family and friends.
I am going to try and make the best out of the next couple of days. Even if I have to excuse myself every now and again to go hide in the closet and have a good cry. We are going to bake cookies for Angus for his Christmas present from the kids. And make a decorative box to put them in. That will be my part lol.
I need to make a trip to the post office and see if my Mothers card came. If it did I will dash to wally world and see what I can pick up for the kids from her. Then back here, and bake sugar cookies so the kids can decorate and eat them until they are sick. I will (and have been) listen to carols all day, taking a half hour brake some time early evening to watch The Little Drummer Boy of course.
I have no idea what time I will get the kids to bed this year, as I can’t use the excuse that Santa won’t come until you are fast asleep! Sheat and dang. Well I have today planned out so it is not to depressing, tomorrow is another day though. I have no idea as what to do to keep everyone from not complain in that they have nothing to do, cause all they have are gift cards to open. Maybe I will let them all have an hour on the computer shopping lol.
I have had so many mixed feelings about this holiday coming up, and the only thing I can really come up with to explain it it like I missed the boat so to speak. Like the old Italian fable about Epiphany. The La Befana (sp?) and the three wise men. She was cleaning her floors and they asked her to go to Bethlehem with them, she declined so she could finish, and later had an epiphany about what she missed. So she wonders the streets looking for the baby Christ. Thats how I feel, I am just wondering looking for something I will never find. Make sense? NO? I don’t get it either. Well there is more to the fable lol.
Anyhoo, gotta get going on those cookies before Angus gets home at 3pm today! Hope Christmas is good to you and yours!
TTFN
Posted on 12/24/04 at 03:17 PM