Of snow and real life events

Tuesday, 11:41 am

By Kate

Yes, we have lots of new snow. School was closed, the lad was deliriously happy. And then the phone started ringing...can the lad come over here, over there, is he home, is he busy, is he awake?

And I told him, “You can go anywhere you want as soon as you shovel the driveway.”

That pretty much settled that. The driveway is still plugged full of snow.

He doesn’t mind at all. It’s a good excuse to stay home and give his full attention to some video games that he has hardly had a chance to look at since Christmas. With his iPod headphones stuck on his head and a mug of strong tea by his side, he’s a happy dude.

I’m content, too. I like seeing him have some downtime to do exactly as he pleases. But didn’t he just have a vacation? Yeah, but it was one of those regimented, gotta-do-something-every-second vacations. The kind where you come home to chill out. So this snow storm had good timing.

Now, the next interesting thing in his life happens on Thursday. He was hired to do the sound for a local stage production of the Vagina Monologues. It’s being sponsored by the local women’s crisis center as a fund raiser. He’s had only a brief look at the script, but says it sounds pretty intense and interesting. His job won’t be difficult—mainly sit around in the booth and watch, with relatively few sound cues to implement. It’s an easy job, but he’s looking forward to it. He said it feels good to be a part of this crew.

It’s an interesting confluence—he’s grown up for the past five years listening to me talk with untold numbers of women in crisis on the hot line. He’s heard stories. He’s seen my reactions and sometimes my tears after a particularly devastating phone call. We’ve talked a lot about violence against women. It’s not an abstract thing to him after having listened to many one sided conversations. I like that he’s growing up aware. And I like that he’s gone out to do fund-raising on his own for various walks, runs, and events. More than that, though, his awareness slips over into real life when he’s confronted with attitudes amongst his peers that either excuse or make light of violence. We do live in a culture that counts violence against women as not very important. In too many cases it’s a topic for jokes. In his quiet way, he’s made it not-so-funny for a number of his peers. I think that’s a very good thing.