His real name is officially defunct

Tuesday, 1:14 pm

By Kate

Aug

16

2005

The lad being away guarantees a lot of message taking. The phone has been going pretty non-stop. Just a few minutes ago an official call came in regarding his Marshall duties this coming school year.  It was an adult who called and it made me laugh. No one ever calls asking for him by his given name. It’s always by his nickname, which is a play on his last name. A good sturdy two syllable nickname that rolls of the tongue nicely.

This all started about ten years ago when he was at soccer camp. The town had hired a bunch of British guys to come and do workshops during the camp. Since the lad’s first name is pretty common in England, the British lads teased him a bit and said he needed something a little more distinctive. And so the nickname was born. It caught on quickly and before the end of camp, everyone was calling him by his new nickname.

And then it continued during the school year. By the time he got to middle school, even the teachers called him by his nickname.

It got to the point where, if I spoke to a teacher, I’d have to use his nickname or they’d look at me blankly. (Honest. It’s a weird experience!) And that was kind of funny since there is only one other kid in the entire school system with the same first name. But it is a distinctive nickname and everyone calls him by it around here. Everyone. Even he does. And, well, so do I now. Because no one knows who I’m talking about if I don’t.

It kind of struck me funny this afternoon when a woman my age called from school. She wouldn’t know the lad if she fell over him, but his nickname appeared on her official list of notification calls to make. I think his nickname has officially been institutionalized.