Cider Press Hill

You get what you pay for

Yesterday afternoon I happened to be at Walmart (the lad bought himself a BB gun) and figured, while I was there, I’d buy a toilet paper dispenser. One of those thingies that screws into the wall so that the male and female household occupants can commence arguing over whether the TP should unroll over or under. In all the years that we’ve lived in this house, that’s one of the things I never got around to installing. TP on the back of the toilet works pretty well. But I thought it would be kind of nice to join the more civilized segments of society.

So I bought a nice looking white painted wooden dispenser. But it wasn’t very expensive, which should have tipped me off. Or just finding it at Walmart should have made me put it back on the shelf.

I read the directions and cut out the template, taking care to cut exactly on the lines. I placed the template into the upper left corner of the vanity where the top and side molding meet. I marked the spots for the screws, drilled the holes, and screwed in the screws. So far, so good. But when I tried to fit the left arm of the dispenser onto the screws and twist to lock, I discovered that the edge of the arm banged into the edge of the molding and couldn’t lock. I needed about another 1/8” of space to lock the screws. I scratched my head over that for a few seconds. When I put the outermost dispenser arm on the template, it fit just fine. But after I looked at the back of it, I realized the holes where the screws were supposed to fit had been milled 3/8” off center. Not that difficult to compensate for it, but it would have been nice to know (or anticipate) before I drilled the holes and screwed in the screws.

Nothing to do but remove the screws and re-do the template an inch or so over and tinker with the measurements a little bit. Now, I’ve installed many things requiring screws over the years and I’m pretty handy with my electric drill/screwdriver. So imagine my extreme frustration when the screw driver attachment completely and almost instantly stripped out the top of the screws. The only way to remove them was with pliers. Totally ruined screws. What the heck did they make them out of? The cheapest, softest metal they could get away with, evidently. And that probably would have been okay if I hadn’t had the other problem. These were obviously one use screws with no margin for error. With the manufacturer’s built in error, I didn’t stand a chance.

If not for the holes in the side of the vanity, I’d consider just plunking the roll of TP back on the top of the toilet and call it good enough. But the holes in the vanity would drive me nuts, so I suppose I’ll have to go to the hardware store and buy a very good quality TP dispenser to cover up the holes. I’d have saved myself a lot of aggravation if I’d bought a quality one in the first place.

I should have recognized an omen when I saw one. When I parked my car in the parking lot, the woman who pulled in the space in front of me had a load of stickers on her car. Front and center was “I’d rather be hunting with Dick Cheney than riding with Ted Kennedy.”

“Do we have any indelible Sharpies in the car?” I asked the lad.

Unfortunately we didn’t.

Posted on 04/20/06 at 06:17 AM
 




Eleanor

It really is a case of “should have known better”, isn’t it?  I’ve been burned so many times by going cheap and/or buying from Walmart, but do I ever learn?  Of course not.  Once in a while a bargain really is a bargain, but usually it isn’t. 

As for the soft screws, you get those even when you pay serious money for something. :( It’s a one shot deal, I guess, and if you mess up on your first attempt, tough.  Luckily I’m a hoarder and save every spare screw or other bit that is left over from any job.  Odds are heavily in favour of my needing it at some point in future, when I’ve screwed up on a first attempt.  Pun intended. ;)

Canada   Posted by Eleanor on 04/20/06  at  03:55 PM





Kate

Should have known better should be etched on my forehead. If only I could have all the wasted dollars back from the should-have-known-better purchases I’ve made over the years.

I’ve noticed the soft screws in other products in the past couple of years, too. I’ve also noticed that many manufacturers like to make their own very special screws that don’t work with other products that have their own very special screws. I have a little jar filled with screws and I rarely can find one to work in a situation like the one yesterday. What ever happened to standardized sizes and shapes?

United States   Posted by Kate on 04/20/06  at  05:57 PM





Linkmeister

Getting away from the screws for a moment, did you resist the BB gun purchase with the loud cry “You’ll put your eye out!” ?? wink

I gave up on the gravatar guy answering my question and just re-registered with the new mail address, by the way.  Now I just have to wait for him to physically examine the same gravatar I’ve been using, rate it as “G,” and allow it.

United States   Posted by Linkmeister on 04/20/06  at  08:18 PM





Kate

LOL! Nope. How did I miss an opportunity like that?! That would have totally cracked him up.

I just said, “Got enough money for it?” He did. See what a difference a few years makes? I didn’t even think about thinking twice about it this time.

Hope to see your gravatar back soon. I like that little guy. Supposedly the Gravatar proprietor signed up a bunch of volunteers to help speed the avatar approval and rating process along.

United States   Posted by Kate on 04/20/06  at  10:33 PM





Linkmeister

Hi there, Gravatar! wink

United States   Posted by Linkmeister on 04/21/06  at  04:14 PM





Kate

Awright! smile

United States   Posted by Kate on 04/21/06  at  05:07 PM





Volkher Hofmann

This post made me laugh out loud. I’m not kidding, but your stuff always fits my current or recent problems in one way or t’other.

The other day the towel holder next to the sink in my (rented) apartment broke off.

“No big deal,” I thought, and went to the next one of those mega hardware stores. Little did I know that my landlored had gone for the cheapest stuff possible way back when and had bought a holder that did/does not conform to any norm. I tried to find one that would fit on top of the holes and screws already in the tiles, but, alas, none was to be found.

So, now I’m stuck with either ruining the tiles or trying to find a holder that has a plate big enough for me to drill holes where the screws are supposed to go. So far, I’ve only found holders that don’t allow for that (because the pre-drilled holes are only a fraction off).

I think I’ll just stay wet.

Germany   Posted by Volkher Hofmann on 04/22/06  at  04:28 PM





Kate

Hey Volkher! Glad to see you!!

Well, for what it’s worth...and not sure if I should really admit this...but I’ve added the 101st use for Krazy Glue to the unofficial List of Uses.

Lightly sanded the backs of the wooden toilet paper dispenser arms, applied an even coating of Advanced Formula Gel Krazy Glue and stuck the suckers to the vanity. Let them dry for 24 hours and began using. They are as solidly attached as if I’d used screws.

Would something like that work for you, Volkher?

United States   Posted by Kate on 04/22/06  at  07:20 PM





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