Cider Press Hill

Coffee shopping

My trip to Trader Joe’s, a couple of weeks ago, has ruined me for Dunkin Donuts’ coffee. A more learned coffee aficionado would think that a real coffee hound wouldn’t even admit to drinking Dunkin Donuts coffee, say nothing of actually liking it. Well, I like the stuff they brew in their stores, but not the beans they sell over the counter anymore.

I have discovered Trader Joe’s Smooth & Mellow Blend coffee. The back of the cannister says:

The Perfect Cup. Containing only the finest blend of 100% Arabica beans roasted to a smooth and mellow medium brown. This medium brown “American” or “City” roast supports rather than overpowers the full yet subtle flavors of our custom bean blend. The acidity is light, the flavor is well rounded and fully developed. Never bitter, Trader Joe’s Smooth and Mellow Blend is great as your first cup in the morning or the last cup well into the night.

Now, those are words I can understand and live by. That’s what my palate says when I take a swig and swirl it around in my mouth.

But, since I won’t be making a weekly trek to Peabody for coffee, I thought I’d look into buying some Green Mountain Coffee. There is plenty to choose from on their web site. I just don’t understand their lingo.

For example, on their light roast pages, their Breakfast Blend looked promising: “Breakfast Blend is one of our most popular blends. It has a rich taste and medium acidity. We think you’ll find this blend to be balanced and smooth.”

Good. I like the medium acidity and balanced and smooth idea.

But then, they go on to quote the highly rated review blurb from coffeereview.com, which says:

A coffee that demonstrates the virtue of a dash of cleanly and sweetly fermented fruit taste in a blend. The aroma is low-toned and caramelly, with smoky and raisiny chocolate suggestions. The cup is roundly rich with a tingle of fermented fruit that reads as a raisin- or brandied-cherry-toned chocolate.

And, I must say, it made me take another swig of my last cup of Trader Joe’s Smooth and Mellow to see if I could find any hint of fermented fruit or caramel or smoke or raisiny chocolate suggestions. I can, with confidence, say I detect some smokiness. But brandied-cherry-toned chocolate? Fermented fruit or caramel? Tchya. My palate, apparently, lacks the refinement to think in fruity, chocolatey, raisiny terms unless my mouth is full of fruit, chocolate, or raisins.

And all you dark roast fans think there’s nothing going on in a cup of light roast coffee!

I looked for a promising medium roast and found their Vermont Blend, a mixture of light and dark beans. They say:

A engaging blend that reveals itself in layers. A darker-roasted base offers mellow, toasty flavors and a velvety mouthfeel, while lighter-roasted, select American beans provide clarity, and a winning finish. The result is a blend that is at once brisk and bright, yet undeniably smooth.

That sounds like a possibility, but then the coffeereview.com blurb says:

Delicate but deeply dimensioned aroma: distinct milk chocolate, hints of aromatic cedar and low-toned, temperate fruit: peach, perhaps, or apricot. Almost sugary sweet in the cup, light-bodied, with a tight-knit complexity centered on peach- or cherry-toned milk chocolate. The finish is short but refreshing.

Now we’re adding aromatic cedar and low-tone temperate fruit—peach (or apricot)—suggestions to milk chocolate suggestions. All that in a cup!

All I want is a mellow and smooth (well-rounded and fully developed) coffee that tastes like coffee, with a low to medium acidity, sold to me in terms I can understand. That’s all. Then I’ll go and desecrate it with cream. But, whatever.

Posted on 11/07/05 at 10:13 AM
 




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